Will I ever go Pixie again?

Everyone that has known me for a while knows that I have taken some drastic hair transformations throughout the years. (Okay not that drastic!) But still, they were extreme even for me. I went from long to short, ombre, shorter, pixie, and finally a short bob + bayalage in less than two years. I forgot what it is like to have hair longer than my shoulders. Having shorter hair than my friends made me realize that sometimes I do miss long hair, but the truth is that shorter hair is just easier in so many ways.

One day, I was reading a post on Pinterest about how to style your short bob in many styles. While I was scrolling down, I found a picture of Jennifer Lawrence back in 2013 with a short pixie haircut. Later that day, I started to pin Audrey Hepburn, Emma Watson, Lilly Collins, Winona Ryder in the ’90s, and Anne Hathaway Pixie hair styles excessively. I saved the images and became obsessed with this style without knowing that a few hours later I was going to drive my car to the beauty salon and tell my hair stylist that I wanted that same haircut.

Without knowing if my face was going to be ideal for the pixie hair style, I told my hair stylist:

“Trim it all, and I do not want to face the mirror because if I do, I will probably regret this decision in the process.”

She did as I said and it all started from there. It was like one of those moments when they drop the bars on a roller coaster. There is no turning back. I am not going to lie to you; those were the tensest three hours of my life. Can you imagine the stress? Sitting on that chair not knowing if you were going to regret this the rest of your life? (Or while your hair grows back). Horrifying thoughts came through my mind, but I still tried to manage a positive attitude towards the situation. Everyone at the beauty salon that has known me for years watched how my hair was being trimmed and shaved. Finally, my hair stylist said: “It is done Gaby, let’s turn you around.”

I have always admired those who love to take risks and seize every moment even if it is good or bad. Due to previous experiences, I was someone that used to live afraid of what people might think about me or how to please everyone without thinking about my happiness. I admit that I was an insecure girl and somehow I still try to manage that insecureness. That day, when I saw myself in the mirror I said to myself:

“You are a different person now. You are a beautiful woman, and it does not matter if you have short, long, or no hair at all your beauty empowers you.

 

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I walked towards the mirror and somehow felt more comfortable. I even discovered features on my face that I never saw before! I asked to myself “Why until this day I decided to trim my hair like this?” At that moment I realized that we are all prisoners of something called society. Whether you are tall, short, different skin color, etc. society has laid firm rules about what beauty is for men and women. Of course, these rules have been taught to all of us since we are kids.

At a young age, every girl wants to be a princess and dream that boys will want to marry them. What do movie princesses such as Pocahontas, Ariel, Jasmine or Sleeping Beauty have in common? Long, smooth, ravishing hair. Every kid grows with that concept of beauty and power. Women are expected to be as ladylike as these princesses or beauty pageant queens. So is it true that whenever we cut our hair, we are also cutting our femininity?

As women, we have been educated that if we have less hair, we are ”less feminine or ladylike” than girls that have mermaid long hair. What’s more, since men have been molded to believe that womanliness is connected with long hair, a lady with short hair is an immediate risk to femininity– and that is a menace to manliness or masculinity. And of course, society hates that. Throughout my pixie experience, I learned so many things, including how to deal with this type of judging and criticism.

Two things girls say when they ask them if they would cut their hair like a boy:

”Boys will not like me if I have a boy-like haircut.”

One of the reasons why girls prefer long hair rather than short hair is that Boys might not like them. These girls feel that having short hair will make boys believe that they are not pretty enough for them. Whether you have long hair or short hair, what man is worth your time if he is going to judge you by your hair length?

“Everyone will think that I am a lesbian.”

While I was in the pixie experience, people asked these questions very often: “Did you became a lesbian?” “Are you into girls now?” Short hair is a typical stereotype for lesbians. If you are sure of your sexual preferences why would these type of questions displease you? I am not going to talk about sexuality in general because it is something difficult to explain. Love is equal. Period.

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I learned to embrace the feeling of being complimented and being criticized at the same time. A pixie haircut says everything without saying anything at all. I loved my pixie, and I have never felt more empowered and secure of myself. I learned to be more confident and to try new things regularly. Do not let critics and society take control of your decisions. Live your life and do whatever makes you happy. If you ask me if I would ever do a pixie haircut again, my answer is yes. Why? Because I feel free, beautiful, and yes FEMININE.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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